Eat Me, Drink Me, Play With My Manhole

Excuse me!?!

Once upon a time, there were two office employees magical fairy princesses assigned to clean out a storage room full of rat turds and fist-sized spiders. Reaching a bejeweled hand into a box of moldy books, one office beech princess cried, "Look! I have found a wonderful game! Let us rest and play with..."

Enticed by the vivid colors and modern art, the pair sat on their giant toadstools and began to 'fantasize' about 'exploring' the wonders of the Manhole:

Somehow, the lighthearted and whimsical tone seems mitigated by the force of the Manhole...

MANHOLE!

... because it's laced with GHB.

Or maybe they're subtly cautioning against, 'if he offers to slip your manhole a hot biscuit'...

Remember the days when software manuals were this simple?

Installation, huh? On most models, that comes standard.
(If this were a drinking game, "hard disk" would get you wasted in 10 min.)

The sequel, "the Womanhole", follows the same format of 'interactive exploration', but they keep that one locked up behind the counter.

FYI: I've been to The Mineshaft in Long Beach, CA. I argue that explains my jump into perverted reverie. Don't know about NotAvril... What's your excuse, lil' bit?

[Big thanks to NotAvril - a great coworker with a sweet nature and delightfully bent sense of humor, without whom this post would not have been possible. Good luck at grad school!]

Lizard the Beautiful

Beautiful without and beautiful within...

She understands fashion.

She has the 'snark'.

She's brilliant and talented... Even if her cohorts don't appreciate her sense.

She's grounded and wise... With a great dose of heart.

She's been with me for decades, despite all changes in our lives.

She makes me laugh, she makes me think... She's strong and yet human, a real work of art.

She speaks her mind, but never spews hate.

She lives with a balance of sarcasm and truth... I've seen her like marble; I've seen her concerned.

She relates life case by case; commentary is just that. She's wise and observant: no two lives are the same.

I'm proud to call her 'friend'. I'm honored to let her in.

In the back of a church, I said "I love you" to a young woman in a white dress... I meant it.

This is friendship. This is true.

May we live another fifty years to see it through.

Thank you.

[Thank you for taking my late night call. Thank you for making me laugh. Thank you for listening in this difficult time.]

DaFoWo Show, Yo!

This dry, witty, and well-scripted weekly serial out of Dallas-Ft. Worth, TX, is always a giggle. It's a local news review and social commentary, but that doesn't make the humor any less accessible to people across the country. If you let the player run for a bit, older episodes will continue playing.





Normally, I use nicknames for Pak members, but John was born to be a star! When we were children, he was always the sweetest kid. As an adult, John is exceedingly clever and his intellect surfaces in razor-sharp wit tempered by kindness and good manners...

Just plain adorable all around. Where is Hollywood with the big contracts?! Move it or lose it, people!