These Kids Will Wipe Your Butt in 40 Years

The future of America has never looked so bright apocalyptic:

Well, my mother is a malignant beignet because she bakes me.

Uh, huh. Hope you have a backup plan.
And which came first, 'collage' or 'college'?

Meaning he doesn't understand the games, just wants the latest scoop on A-Rod?

I are facilitate with bad grammar.

If you say that with a Scottish accent, it doesn't sound so bad.

Perhaps, I am being a grammar and composition snob. I certainly do not live up to my education all of the time. In an era of increasing disparity between wealthy and poor, comfortable and struggling, I should give the benefit of the doubt to children who may have difficult lives, which affect their ability to learn.

Or I could just benign the bacon pizza.

NOTE: Clips were taken from 9th grade vocabulary tests during the middle of the year. These children are not remedial, nor are they English Language Learners, nor in the juvenile court system.

(Thanks to G-Chen of SoCal: a lovely lady with lots of wit, energy and smiley goodness. CONGRATULATIONS on the new job! Good luck with the rugrats, my dear... And the censored language.)