One-Sided Conversation

When you post surveys or meme's on a social site, you should expect most people to ignore them.
To the masses, it's basically a Twitter Monologue.

However, there are those pen-and-paper dorks, such as I, who do most of our casual reading online these days... And read every line of every survey you post, frequently bursting into ironic laughter or verbally barking at the computer screen, "What do you mean you're a 'good girl'?! HELLO?!? Who was the first married lady to get naked in the hot tub at Girls Weekend in Vegas?!"


It's been a bit since we checked in with St. Nick... And guess who posted a survey.

"Let's Get Ready To RUMMM-BLE!":



Who do you think reads these?
no one.
[Oh, you foolish, foolish man.]


Are you reading any books right now?
The Yeats Reader but I got a bunch more for variety :)
[Good literary choice to balance out those bodice-rippers.]


Have you ever peed in the woods?
well yeah, who hasn't, you're not a whole person unless you become one with nature by peeing on it.
[But have you ever peed on yourself while peeing in the woods?]


Do you ever dance even if there's no music playing?
there's always music, in my head.
[Like your own soundtrack? I'm thinking yours is Stayin' Alive by the Bee Gees.]


Do you chew your pens and pencils?
nope, more of a suckle, lol, jk
[Please tell me there's a blackmail photo on the web.]


What is your "Song of the Week"?
Simply Irresistible "She's a craze you'd endorse, she's a powerful force You're obliged to conform when there's no other course She used to look good to me, but now I find her

Simply irresistible"

[That's so St. Nick.]


Is it okay for guys to wear pink?
no
[Please, like you're not wearing a pink polo while you sip sangria and thumb Yeats.]


Whats your favorite love movie?
Before Sunrise..Sunset
[Okay, those are the favorites of the relationship/emotionally-challenged... and also Starshine's favorites... 'nuf said.]


Would you ever strip or pose nude in a magazine?
N/A
[BTDT. But were you wearing booty glitter at the time?]


What's upset you the most in the past week?
a cold onion, quatro, jager, whiskey, and beer.
[You and you macho man breakfasts, sheesh.]


When is the last time you said "i love you" to your number 1 on your top?
doesn't quite fit.
[Um, huh? Was that supposed to be "to your number 1 while they're on top"?]


When was the last time you cried?
When I had some super strong coffee and didn't blink for like 20 minutes.
[Ha ha; you rock.]


Is the last person you kissed more than a year older than you?
Dude, I went to a wedding, there were grannies there, so technically, many years older!
[Nothing says 'sexy' like the sweet taste of Bengay and Fixodent.]


You have to get a piercing, what do you get?
brow i suppose
[And if we bet you a lot of money on a dare?]


Do you like when people play with your hair?
Love it!
[...When it's old ladies fresh from bingo with a big jackpot to spend.]



Oh, St. Nick, how we enjoy your delicate balance of smart-ass and clown-with-disturbing-smile. I think it's time for more Pho, yo!

Who Wants To Scrub The Grill?

OMFG.

Remember those summer nights, the grill smoking in the background while the kids play in the yard?

...Sinking your arm into a cooler up to the elbow, digging for the preferred beverage?

And then the rain would break, soft and heavy, hissing on the pavement, on the overheated grill...

And what to do IF THE GRILL GOT WET....

Uh, huh.

I guess the girl behind the grill is the most important variable in the equation...

(Thanks to Starshine for this giggle.)

Soundtrack to a Lovely Evening

I stumbled across this while crawling through the 6 Degrees of StalkerSpace (via Starshine of Bellevue, WA); the beauty of it brings to mind of a lot of good memories.

Picture SoCal in summer, after dark, circled lawn chairs on someone's patio or in a driveway, speaker in the window, occasional wafts of the grill cooling off. The music turns soulful sweet, and everyone runs out of conversation at the same time. Backdrop to stereo, the life sounds of neighbors, traffic, and (in my neck of suburbia) the symphony of little frogs in the damp washouts hum on. For a few minutes, all seems perfection; when the feeling lasts until dawn, it certainly is.

Remember when?:

Lyrics & Music by God Made Flesh (Jenni Wildflower) [Copyright, TM, R, etc. legal stuff]



"Negro Spiritual"

Michael when you gonna get outta that boat
Michael when you gonna learn how to float
Michael when you gonna be my swan
Michael when we gonna see a new dawn

Michael I exhausted wanting for one touch
this fasting and this praying's gone on long enough
If you an angel you should listen to God's daughter
If you a messenger come trouble these waters

Come to me I'll be your miracle
I will pervade your body like a Negro Spiritual

Michael you the one who tossed about
by every wind of doctrine blowing about
Michael you're not being careful can't you see
Michael you need to turn and look at me
Look at me

Michael why you listen what men say
you take their words to heart you digging your own grave
Michael you more than just another king
Michael you an everlasting thing

Come to me I'll be your miracle
I will pervade your body like a Negro Spiritual

--Michael don't you go and do no violence to your soul
you know you shouldn't hurt something that old--

Michael I just a stone out on the road
You shake the firmament you get the story told
I loved you once and now what's done is done
Michael in the end the kingdom come come come

to you it be your miracle it will pervade your body like a Negro Spiritual Come to me I'll be your miracle
I will pervade your body like a Negro Spiritual


Sleep tight, pretties.

Before Sunrise

Nothing ventured, nothing gained.

At once terrifying and exquisite, it is surrender to the unknown, releasing our inhibitions and dismantling well-developed defenses, pushing past all self-repression to embrace a new piece of knowledge and the possibility of hope renewed and faith restored.

Those individuals who inspire and invoke such radical action beyond our comfort zone with sincere kindness and absence of ulterior motive or passive-aggressive dominance, all for the purpose of gently pressing us into a new world of brighter possibilities, are the muses of modern times.

They're our blood. They're our friends. They have their needs and problems, but they're our family of choice, blood or no.

We love them and stand by them, even when they fail us...
Even when they fail themselves.

We cannot imagine our world, our lives, our souls without them.

Life will take many paths, some which cross more frequently than others.

To all my pretties:
When the shit hits the fan and you feel pressed beyond bearing, you can always come home.

This door is always open; here, you will never be forgotten.

Welcome to our newest addition from Bellevue, WA. Another brilliant inspiration in the dark heart of American apathy. Head high, Starshine: you're more important than you know.